Things to do when your wife yells
If your wife shouts or yells at you even in public, it can mean she is not happy with the relationship (maybe there is something you are doing repeatedly that she does not like) between you guys in the marriage. Or she is stressed out perhaps due to the workload she handles at her workplace. Or simply because you are the one that first yelled at her. However, it is ok for spouses to yell at each other in marriage as long it is something that doesn’t turn out abusive in the long run.
Let’s take, for instance, your wife gets upset and shouts at you because you always leave your dirty socks on the floor, this would mean you need to work on this and start putting them in the hamper. It is also important to try to stay calm and avoid getting defensive. It’s also essential to try to understand why she’s yelling and see if there’s anything you can do to help resolve the issue.
You can also see this article for reasons your wife gets angry when you ask her questions if this may be the case.
Although this may have made you feel disrespected, unimportant, emotionally abused or even feel not good enough. You have to understand that it’s normal for couples to argue and even yell at each other occasionally.
But if your wife is constantly yelling at you, it could be a sign of a bigger problem in the relationship and there may be a need to request help to talk to a therapist or counselor who can help you both communicate better.
In this article, we discuss reasons your wife could be yelling at you whether at home or in public and ways you can make her stop yelling at you.
What to do if your wife shouts at you
It can be difficult to deal with a wife who constantly shouts at you, as the best way to stop your wife from yelling at you will vary depending on the situation and relationship between you and her.
If your wife yells at you whether in front of a child, in public or even over small things, the following is what you can do:
- First assess the situation to understand why she is always yelling at you
- Then try to talk to her calmly and have an honest conversation with her
- Apologize even if you don’t think you did anything wrong. Sometimes just acknowledging that her feelings are valid can be enough to calm her down.
- Try to see if you can offer a solution to the problem that’s causing her anger.
- Seek professional help for you both
- Take control of your own emotions
Assess the situation
Trying to understand why she is yelling is the first and most important step in other to stop your wife from yelling. Is she stressed, upset about something specific, or just generally unhappy? Once you know the root cause of her anger, you can try to address it. This can be difficult, as yelling can often be a way of masking anger. However, if you can help your wife to recognize why she is getting angry and what triggers her to yell, she will be more likely to manage her anger in a more rational way.
Talk to her calmly and have an honest conversation with her
You can then try to have a calm discussion with your wife after you have assessed the situation about why she feels the need to shout all the time. It could be that she’s feeling overwhelmed and stressed about something and just needs to vent. If that’s the case, see if you can help her find other ways to release her frustration. Maybe she would benefit from going for a run, taking some time for herself each day or ensuring you give her a hug at least 4 times a day. If her shouting is due to something specific that you’re doing, try to change your behavior.
Offer a solution to the problem that is causing her to shout or scream at you
If she’s yelling because she’s overwhelmed with household chores, for example, offer to help out more around the house. If she is the one who’s been taking on the majority of domestic duties, it’s time to share the load and help her make her life easier. You can also try to diffuse the situation whenever she screams by making a joke or trying to lighten the mood.
Seek professional help
If you can’t seem to figure out what’s causing her to shout, it might be worth seeing a counselor together to help get to the bottom of things. A therapist e.g., an anger management therapist can help to manage your wife’s anger to prevent emotional abuse, and also provide some guidance on how to respond to her outburst.
Take control of your own emotions
It is very crucial that you are aware of your own emotions. The only person you can control is yourself, which is why the first thing you need to do when you hear your wife scream is stop reacting and start responding.
When you respond in a way that allows you to control your own emotions, it helps to build self-respect and helps you stay calm.
Reasons that make your wife yell at you
There could be many reasons why your wife always yells at you. Whatever the reason, it’s important to try to understand why she’s yelling, and to respond in a way that will help resolve the issue.
The following are 4 common reasons your wife can yell at you, and they are:
She may feel overwhelmed and stressed
If your wife is going through some kind of stress either at her office or catering for the kids at home, then yelling at you may be a way she is trying to release some of her pent-up frustration. She’s overwhelmed with day-to-day tasks and responsibilities and feels like she can’t catch a break. If this is the case, then it is critical to be understanding and patient with her. Try to provide her with support and encouragement, and help her find ways to cope with her stress more constructively.
She may feel neglected
If your wife feels neglected, she may start yelling at you as a way to get your attention. Neglect can be a major problem in marriages, and it’s important to try to avoid it. If your wife feels like she’s not getting the attention she needs from you, make sure to spend some quality time with her and listen to her concerns. She may appreciate the opportunity to share her feelings with you and feel more understood as a result.
She may feel unappreciated
If your wife feels unappreciated, she may start yelling at you as a way to express her frustration. In order to prevent this from happening, try to make an effort to show your appreciation for all that she does. Thank her often, compliment her on her looks and hair just as we explained in this article here, and let her know how much you value her. If she feels appreciated, she will be less likely to feel the need to yell.
She sees it as a way of communicating her needs
Your wife may yell at you as a way of communicating her needs to you. Either her needs are not being heard or her needs are not being met. Also, she may not even be aware of what she is doing and may think her behavior is acceptable. You may need to sit her down and have an honest conversation with her and then see if there is a way to meet her needs.
Wrapping up!
If nothing else works, please always walk away from the situation each time she yells at you until she has calmed down. This doesn’t mean you’re giving up on your marriage and relationship. But as we discussed earlier at the beginning of the article that it is normal for couples or spouses to yell at each other in their relationship and if you can give it some time maybe yelling, swearing, shouting or screaming will cease in the future.
Long-lasting relationships thrive on patience and healthy communication. Except your wife is verbally abusive, give it some time.